Coeur méchanique, ou est sont piles?

Happy Halloween.... tomorrow is my first day in my new apartment. I'm excited & nervous at the same time. I think the nerves part derives from the fact that I have a total of zero boxes packed, & the same amount of words written for my 2000-word term paper in Greek Mythology.

I have to admit though... I can't wait to get settled in our new place. K.L. & I have been trying to get a place for two months. Not to mention, with my impending departure, the status on the home front is a little bit hectic. It's so cold in the house, literally & figuratively. It's hard to breathe when there's someone choking you with your own heart-strings.

In other news, I'm going to Tool in December. I'm pretty stoked about it. They're the one band I've always wanted to see, purely for their amazing talent. It's going to be an orgasmic experience, much like NIN was, only to a higher extent.

My new favourite kind of music is future lounge. Everyone go download "The Mirror Conspiracy" by Thievery Corporation.

& you heard it here first: The next new big trend is going to be gloves, cute ones with buttons & lace & such. We'll wear them all year, like Victorian England. I can see it in the equestrian jackets, it's the logical next step. Go buy cute gloves.

& Woodstock has it right when he told The Boy that suspenders are the next big thing for guys, white ones especially.

Scholastic Fantastic

My scholarly goal this term: To learn to love writing papers.

The Only Thing I'll Be Listening to for 6 Months.

Yes.

It is finally out.

Three years since Futures, two since Stay On My Side Tonight (EP).

I've missed them.

Buy it... it's their best album since Clarity. The fact that I can say that with confidence despite that I listened to it for the first time today (even though it leaked on the internet like two weeks ago) is a threat to even that album (Clarity being my absolute favourite album--by any band). If you aren't going to buy it, download it and get converted. Then buy it.

Favourite track: #6. Gotta Be Somebody's Blues.

Interesting facts:

• Jim Adkins and Zach Lind had their family members sing for parts of the album.
• Big Casino is a reference to Adkins' side project "Go Big Casino"
• Naomi would love the cello in the above "Favourite track"
• The band is getting such intense reviews for their live show (which I can personally vouch for) that this release is almost assuredly going to be their most successful. I'm really excited to see them getting the press they deserve.
• This album is a lot darker than previous ones.
• Though Rolling Stone describes them as "power pop rock", iTunes lists them as Alt/Punk. I'd have to say both are fair...

Plans for Planet

My Blog Action Day Post:

(This piece is a very old poem I wrote about 3 years ago -- before climate change became an environmental issue. I thought it would suit the theme of environmental awareness)


Autumn MD

Sweet Serenity
The leaves on the weeping trees
Are scrying for me;
To join them forever ---
The eternity of fall.

Fall;
Frisky, feathery flight ---
Dancing in autumn delight.
She blows you but one kiss that
Tastes of bark and burning clove.
Smokey resistance;
Flirting on the brink.
Take another drink,
Toast to the harvest moon.
Opens her legs only to trees
Scares the leaves, birds, and bees.
Joined you with a warm smile
To leave you cold, shivering
And exposed.
She’s a fiesty delight, bi-polar
opposed.
-------------------------------

We're in a world where fall means high wind/huricaine season, and winter is a lot milder than it was (way back?) in the nineties. Summer tsunamis because our junkyard ocean can't handle the pressure of hundreds/thousands of dying species, the grief is thick withall. Spring doesn't bring the same things it used to when insects move northward and destroy ecosystems. Our planet is dying, and we have no plan to save it.

Manifesto

Today I will become an achiever.

Today I will print out "Desiderata" and read it each morning when my alarm goes off, until I can do it by memory.

When I read the poem at my alarm, I will actually get out of bed instead of hitting the snooze button.

Throughout my day, I will consciously let go of things that shouldn't bother me: Like the cigarette that beats pangs of stress, despite the broken accomplisment meant for better health; stress takes more years off your life than carbon monoxide.

My day will be accomplished with the help of no one. Head held high, responsibility all mine. I will take joy in cooking my own meals, making my own bed, prioritizing my life.

I won't let the bastards get me down.

Surrounding myself with people whom I love that love me.

Embellishing my stories. Letting my internal monologue turn into a conversation. The freedom of the stage of mind flourishing from floorboard to fly. I will be the main actor; the director; the crowd. I will cheer for the happy and sympathise with the sad. Allow my distance to be catharsis.

I can kill the plastic piece-off-something posed as a spider.
I can manage time so that it doesn't manage me.
I can burn the bridges to my fireproof Empire.
Allow myself to justify things -- stop this twenty-year guilt trip.
One day I will be able to look back on this and laugh.
One day I'll appreciate the internal dialogue.
One day I'll say this was how I became who I am.
Without fear, reproof, or undue anxiety.
I will be healthy even though it hurts.
I will sleep properly even though I'm never awake.
I will find myself even though I don't feel lost.

/Sidenote

I'm twenty now. Yes, birthday party was a success. Had close friends over for dinner, out-of-town friend arrived safe (1/2). We bussed to where others were celebrating, bands were playing and drinks were consumed with vigor. You know it's good when the party is "interrupted" by the police before midnight. It was quite violent actually: attack dogs, tasers, fourteen or so spending the night in the drunk tank... luckily my whole party managed to get out safely to taxicabs or Denny's. And I got a new fish from Ebsedtha who is heretofore dubbed: Topoeia Chiron Centaury. Or "Fish", just like the last one.

Drawn With a Steady Hand (Fireproof)

Yes, these are pictures I took with my camera.


Which of course indicates my level of ecstaticness -- my camera returned on Wednesday morning, the same day I left on the ferry to Metropolis to see my favorite band in the world play at the most beautiful venue on this side of the country. I also had the pleasaure of staying with my ol' buddy Led (You know that online-friend phase? Led is one of those ones who stuck -- known him for seven years but only met twice).



We saw Jimmy Eat World play at the Commodore, which was a defining point in my life. Led understood my need to be free in the crowds of fans who all loved the band as much as I did. I explored the ballroom entirely, it's an amazing venue. Afterwards, Led and I burned inscence (so to speak) in Robson Square and he skillfully recited some Anglo-Saxon poetry. Learned that he was an English major too. Reminds me I have a lot to learn...

After getting two hours of sleep, Led woke up and made me a beautiful tofu breakfast. I didn't have time to eat much as I had to catch my taxi to the bus terminal so I could make the 7:00am ferry back home. Slept a few more hours, got up just in time to hop in my car and make my Greek and Roman Mythology midterm -- which I raped -- and come back home to skip women's studies and sleep until 5:00pm.

The folks are in town again. I came home to my brother asleep on my couch, having gotten in through the side entrance. Anyone who's been in close touch with me knows what that means... and yeah, I'm coping just fine aside from the occassional nuclear meltdown in my cerebral cortex.